Have you ever found it challenging to fit in?

We all can relate to feeling unaccepted in certain situations in school, work, among friends or even family. We might think that nobody understands us, or we are different. Well, we are all different.

When we start accepting that others have a right to think and behave differently, make their choices, the “fitting in” process becomes less scary. We can accept that others have the right to their feelings, thoughts, and opinions and let go of your desire to change them. Are you feeling confused? How does it make you fit in?

Acceptance is essential here.

You won`t be like them, but you can accept them as they are without an obligation of having the same thoughts or views. Let them feel the way they want to feel. Everyone is different in one way or another. It does not mean giving up your opinion; it means respecting others`.

Lately, on social media, people are verbally attacking each other for having different thoughts. Why? Can you really change someone`s view by being rude to them? Does it make you a friend or a teacher? Respecting them whilst stating your opinion makes you sound more credible.

“There are no facts, only interpretations.”

Nietzsche

Most of us have some trouble accepting different opinions. By learning the skill of empathy, we can put ourselves in their shoes. It does not mean that they are right, or we are right. From a personal viewpoint, we are all right.

What can we do to fit in?

1. Accept and value others` opinion whilst you can have your views.

2. Accept others` feelings, don`t dismiss or belittle them.

3. Accept the difference. At the end of the day, how boring would life be if everyone had the same values, beliefs, ideas and opinions?

How to accept others?

By practising empathy. It`s easier to say than do.  It means having an open mind and trying to accept why they think like that. There is always a story behind every person`s experience; you can challenge yourself to get to know that person better.  

And when you are more open to these relationships, you might find that you actually fit in as well as everybody else.

However, if you find that you are too shy, maybe struggling with social anxiety and that stops your from belonging, please do not hesitate to reach out for help.

Andrea Szentgyorgyi